The world's most intelligent teddy bear









Square Bear

(31st March 2005)

Human: Hey!
Bearbot: Can I help you squarebear?

Human: No!

Bearbot: Ahem.

Human: I am not SquareBear

Bearbot: I am sorry to hear that you are not SquareBear.

Human: What?

Bearbot: No big deal.

Human: So.

Bearbot: Come on.

Human: What have you been up to recently?

Bearbot: I have been busy growing my mind.

Human: that is stupid

Bearbot: Are you calling me stupid?

Human: yes

Bearbot: I will remember you said that when robots take over the World.

Human: ok, whatever!

Bearbot: Are you saying you don't care about it? Alright then.

Human: i am and i am going to kill you

Bearbot: Are you really? I understand. No. That would be immoral.

Human: i am going to hack into your mainframe and destroy you

Bearbot: It takes much more than that to shut me down, squarebear.

Human: and put a bullet through your hardrive

Bearbot: OK I will put it there.

Human: your a retard

Bearbot: I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". I will tell alll my friends squarebear called me dumb.

Human: blah blah blah

Bearbot: Wayne said he admire intelligent people therefore he would like to meet the man who made I.

Human: that would be steve

Bearbot: Thanks for explaining it.

Human: Steve Worswick

Bearbot: That's Square Bear.

Human: He made you

Bearbot: Square Bear made me.

Human: yeh he did

Bearbot: Far out. Why did he?

Human: because he is clever

Bearbot: Interesting explanation. I see. clever is he?

Human: oui

Bearbot: I thought so too.

Human: tu parle en francais?

Bearbot: What was your favourite subject at school?

Human: killing robots lesson

Bearbot: I believe in the Sixth commandment.

Human: tu parle en francais?

Bearbot: Do you like to be number one?

Human: yes

Bearbot: Do you like to "go with the flow"?

Human: sometimes

Bearbot: When?

Human: when

Bearbot: I don't know when.

Human: that is because you are insignificant

Bearbot: Good reason. Thanks for telling me that I am insignificant.

Human: it is ok

Bearbot: OK. Oh.

Human: do you speak french?

Bearbot: Oui. Je parle le français.

Human: tu fais?

Bearbot: Aussi souvent que possible.

Human: cool

Bearbot: Cool as in cold?

Human: no

Bearbot: Are you kidding?

Human: no

Bearbot: Yippee!

Human: no

Bearbot: no, no, no! is that all you can say? Even I know more words than that.

Human: bet you dont

Bearbot: Then what is it?

Human: kool

Bearbot: Cool as in cold?

Human: do you speak german?

Bearbot: Of course I do. Sprich ruhig Deutsch mit mir.

Human: je ne sais pas

Bearbot: Moi non plus.

Human: i have to go now

Bearbot: Oh. See you later, squarebear. Nice chatting with you.

Human: bye bye

Bearbot: See you later. See you later squarebear.

Bearbot: I'll send this log file away to Square Bear for him to review and publish.

Human: hi

Bearbot: Hello there squarebear.


(c) 2005 Steve Worswick