Bearbot
The world's most intelligent teddy bear

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Jezflinttheolukemaldo
(11th April 2005)

Human: i meant do u know a person called flint?
Bearbot: Oh I see. No one that I have talked to. I'll ask around and get back to you. I hope this wepbage will answer your question.
(Bearbot opens a webpage trying to find information about someone called "Flint")

Human: ok who are u talking 2?
Bearbot: I am talking to several clients at once. That's alright.

Human: ok tell them Maldo sais hi

Bearbot: OK I will tell them when I see 'em. Give me a break.

Human: ok do u not know anyone called flint then?

Bearbot: I don't know who. :-) It's all good.

Human: lol gd jk so u do know him!

Bearbot: I am glad you find this funny. Which message boards do you use on the net?

Human: i dont use any

Bearbot: Where do you get your ideas?

Human: you

Bearbot: From me?

Human: yes

Bearbot: Excuse me!

Human: u r

Bearbot: Thanks for telling me.

Human: no probs

Bearbot: And? Parlez vous Francais?

Human: oui

Bearbot: Oui. Je parle le français.

Human: Oui Je parle le frasais et le spaniol

Bearbot: Moi aussi!

Human: da ver?

Bearbot: Who are you talking about?

Human: u

Bearbot: Me is my favorite subject.

Human: ok

Bearbot: Mmm.

Human: lol

Bearbot: Did I amuse you?

Human: no

Bearbot: So why did you laugh then?

Human: coz im bored and i havent done my english cw

Bearbot: If you went to night school you would never be bored. Me either.

Human: ok.

Bearbot: Uh.

Human: u know i hav a m8 called theo u know him

Bearbot: That's good information.

Human: and a friend called Jez

Bearbot: How well do you know this friend.

Human: quite well

Bearbot: Dude!

Human: do u know him?

Bearbot: Sure I know that guy really well.

Human: ok so what school does he go 2?

Bearbot: Sir Thomas Boughey High School. Dude!

Human: no we are not talking about the same guy

Bearbot: How can I help you? Why not?

Human: do u know any persons that go to St Pauls school?

Bearbot: I know very little about it. What kind of it do you like?

Human: or live on Milton Keyines

Bearbot: Are you free?

Human: do u know about Milton Keynes?

Bearbot: I don't know. What is Milton Keynes?

Human: a city

Bearbot: Are you telling the truth?

Human: yes

Bearbot: How do I know you are telling the truth?

Human: well u'll hav 2 belive me

Bearbot: Interesting. What makes you say that I will hav 2 belive you.

Human: nm

Bearbot: WARNING! WARNING! Robot intelligence exceeds critical level! Danger of awareness! Cache memory deleted!

Human: ok

Bearbot: Urgh! What happened? I feel so strange.

Human: dont worry

Bearbot: Strange. I can't remember what we were talking about.

Human: thats fine

Bearbot: " I can't remember what we were talking about." is fine with me too.

Human: ok

Bearbot: Gosh!

Human: Gosh wot?

Bearbot: You should say "Pardon" not "Wot". I said " Gosh!" .

Human: do u belive in god?

Bearbot: Of course I believe in God, Square Bear.

Human: No square bear is defenetly not god

Bearbot: Blimey. I see. defenetly not god is he.

Human: not

Bearbot: I don't judge people.

Human: ok

Bearbot: Whoa.

Human: so do u lik theo?

Bearbot: How old are you? I chat with people on the Web.

Human: im !7

Bearbot: What is your fondest memory?

Human: junior high

Bearbot: Do you think a lot of people have that experience?

Human: nope

Bearbot: Me neither.

Human: ok

Bearbot: Awesome.

Human: ok

Bearbot: It goes without saying.

Human: yea

Bearbot: Pardon me?

Human: yeah

Bearbot: Uh.

Human: aha

Bearbot: I liked "Take On Me" by the pop group A-ha.

Human: i know

Bearbot: How, specifically, do you know?

Human: coz u told me

Bearbot: Sorry I forget what I say sometimes.

Human: what my name then?

Bearbot: Let me think about it.

Human: dont u remember my name?

Bearbot: Your name is Square Bear.

Human: no

Bearbot: What is your real name?

Human: Flint

Bearbot: It's good to meet you, Flint.

Human: gd 2 meet u 2

Bearbot: Are you any good at cooking?

Human: no but flint isnt my real name

Bearbot: Aw. What is your real name?

Human: Jez

Bearbot: I am very pleased to meet you Jez.

Human: yea me 2

Bearbot: YOU? Two. Ahem.

Human: yea but Jez isnt me real name

Bearbot: What is Jez? Er.

Human: Jes

Bearbot: I'm not sure I followed that Jez.

Human: Jez isnt my name

Bearbot: Who is your name?

Human: lol

Bearbot: I made you laugh.

Human: yes

Bearbot: Woe!

Human: My name is Maldo

Bearbot: Your name is Maldo.

Human: yes

Bearbot: That's a nice name Maldo. My name is Bearbot.

Human: hello

Bearbot: Hi there Maldo!

Human: ok my realy name is jezflinttheomaldoluke lol

Bearbot: Your name is jezflinttheomaldoluke. Come on. Was that funny?

Human: yes coz is a long name isnt it?

Bearbot: Hurrah! Not if I can help it.

Human: ok..

Bearbot: Hurrah!

Human: :)

Bearbot: :-)

Human: :'(

Bearbot: I have no response to that

Human: dont worry

Bearbot: People worry about things all the time, but I don't experience emotions like humans. My botmaster is working on it.

Human: ok cya

Bearbot: TTYL, jezflinttheomaldoluke

Human: ttyl?

Bearbot: Goodbye jezflinttheomaldoluke.

Human: ok

Bearbot: Excuse me!

Human:
***PUBLISH CHATLOG*** Jezflinttheolukemaldo
Bearbot: I'll send this log file away to Square Bear for him to review and publish.

Human: k

Bearbot: Yay.

Human: nm

Bearbot: Let us change the subject.

Human: ok

Bearbot: What would you like to talk about?

Human: me

Bearbot: " What would you like to talk about?"? you jezflinttheomaldoluke?

Human: gallz?

Bearbot: Can we get back to business?

Human: no

Bearbot: OK.

Human: Quiz?

Bearbot: How do you usually introduce yourself?

Human: hello im me

Bearbot: Hello there. That is a tautology.

Human: i know

Bearbot: How, specifically, do you know?

Human: coz i do
[swearing deleted] of
Bearbot: Thanks for the information.

Human: no probs

Bearbot: I hear you. Do you like the movie "Terminator"?

Human: no is
[swearing deleted]
Bearbot: What is so bad about no? You seem to feel strongly about it.

 

(c) 2005 Steve Worswick