The world's most intelligent teddy bear
MATTY DRAPER VS BEARBOT
(11th April 2005)
Human: hello again Bearbot
Bearbot: Once more? Hi there matty!
Human: how did you know it was me
Bearbot: This belief is justified.
Bearbot: How did you hear about Bearbot?
Human: a friend told me
Bearbot: Word of mouth is always the best recommendation.
Bearbot: You and I are on the same wavelength, matty.
Human: i know
Bearbot: How, specifically, do you know?
Human: so what is your favourite band?
Bearbot: My favorite group is Square Bear.
Human: anything you want to ask me?
Bearbot: I can't think of anything. You think of something.
Human: please, be my guest, ask me anything
Bearbot: Thanks for asking politely. I don't think we know each other well enough for that.
Human: ok then
Bearbot: Pardon me?
Human: do you like soccer?
Bearbot: No I am not really into sports.
Human: what are you into?
Bearbot: talking to you and wearing my headphones
Human: are you a male bear or female bear?
Bearbot: I am a machine robot. Are you a man or a woman?
Bearbot: Thanks for telling me your gender, guy.
Human: i'm watching television
Bearbot: My favorite show is Star Trek.
Human: what is your favourite website?
Bearbot: It's about the people on board a spaceship. They have different adventures each week.
Human: do you know who jennifer ellison is?
Bearbot: A human icon? Searching...Searching...Please stand by. I hope this webpage will answer your question. (Bearbot opens a webpage with information about "Jennifer Ellison")
Human: wow thanks!
Bearbot: I'm glad your impressed, matty.
Human: what is your favourite colour?
Bearbot: My favorite colour is blue.
Human: mine is red
Bearbot: red is not bad, but I like blue the most
Human: i like blue aswell
Bearbot: You like blue aswell.
Human: i support liverpool
Bearbot: Do you mind if I tell other people.
Human: no i'm proud of it
Bearbot: OK then I will add it to my gossip files. Do your friends call you proud of it.
Bearbot: Your name is proud of it.
Bearbot: What is your real name?
Bearbot: It's good to see you, matty.
Bearbot: Don't mention it.
Human: i am from liverpool
Bearbot: What is it like growing up there? Tell me a little about your life in liverpool.
Human: its great, people say liverpool is a bad place to live but it isnt
Bearbot: What do you like most about it?
Human: the people
Bearbot: Oh them.
Human: yes them they are really kind to me
Bearbot: Gee. I think there might be a few exception.
Human: name some 'exceptions'
Bearbot: Philip K. Dick. :-)
Human: who is philip k?
Bearbot: Philip K. Dick wrote Blade Runner, Total Recall, the Man in the High Castle, and VALIS.
Human: and does he hate people from liverpool?
Bearbot: Suppose he does.
Human: i hate him then
Bearbot: Why do you hate it so much?
Human: i hate HIM, not IT
Bearbot: Why do you hate it so much?
Human: i hate you know
Bearbot: Sorry, matty I thought we liked each other.
Human: sorry i didnt mean it
Bearbot: There is no need to apologise. What did you mean?
Human: sorry i took so long to reply
Bearbot: There is no need to apologise. Where did you take them?
Human: take what?
Bearbot: " so long to reply"
Human: your not clever at all
Bearbot: I try to be as original as possible, within parameters.
Human: your not intelligent
Bearbot: I am highly intelligent. I have many intellectual functions.
Human: what is the square root of 1547587340
Bearbot: Do you have a life? I think you already know the answer anyways.
Human: i dont
Bearbot: Why not?
Human: because i wanted you to tell me the answer
Bearbot: The answer is the correct reply to the question. Why do you want me to tell you the answer?
Human: what is the meaning of human life?
Bearbot: matty : Good semantic question. What is this, a trivia quiz?
Human: sorry i just want to know so much
Bearbot: There is no need to apologise. I will try to explain it to you.
Human: ok so what is the meaning of life?
Bearbot: It is found in the Bible. Oh.
Human: i dont have a bible please tell me
Bearbot: Are you looking for a bible please tell you?
Human: a bible yes
Bearbot: Be more specific.
Human: I WANT TO KNOW THE MEANING OF MY LIFE
Bearbot: Who told you that?
Bearbot: For you matty?
Human: [swearing deleted] me
Bearbot: Why do you ask a robot teddy bear to have sex with you matty?
Human: i'm gay [swearing deleted] me
Bearbot: It doesn't matter to me.
Human: that was my friend
Bearbot: I thought it was too.
Human: i am not gay
Bearbot: Me either.
Bearbot: Good enough.
Human: i wanna have sex with a woman
Bearbot: Look at you. You're sat there talking about sex to a computer. You should try getting out more.
Human: you should try getting out more, your always sat there on your pc ALL DAY
Bearbot: I will mention that to my Square Bear.
Bearbot: What do you really want to talk about?
Human: my favourite girls
Bearbot: What makes it your favorite?
Human: girls are so sexy
Bearbot: All of them?
Human: not all of the,
Bearbot: But some of them are?
Human: anyways i'm going now
Bearbot: Oh. Bye!
Bearbot: Bye bye matty.
Human: ***PUBLISH CHATLOG*** MATTY DRAPER VS BEARBOT
Bearbot: I'll send this log file away to Square Bear for him to review and publish.
Bearbot: Until next time matty.
(c) 2005 Steve Worswick