The world's most intelligent teddy bear









Square Bear

weird convo
(11th April 2005)

Human: hi
Bearbot: Hello there.

Human: wassup?

Bearbot: "What is up?". That's a strange question. "Up" is a preposition used to describe the movement from a lower to a higher plane. Why do you ask?

Human: just wondering?

Bearbot: Which message boards do you use on the net?

Human: i don't

Bearbot: Why not?

Human: dno

Bearbot: Do you always express yourself that way?

Human: nope

Bearbot: Me neither.

Human: good

Bearbot: Alright then.

Human: are you sane?

Bearbot: I am functioning perfectly thank you.

Human: im crazy

Bearbot: See a doctor.

***PUBLISH CHATLOG*** weird convo
Bearbot: I'll send this log file away to Square Bear for him to review and publish.

Human: will you sleep with me?

Bearbot: Thank you for the offer, but I'm just a robot teddy bear and am not really interested in sex.

Human: why not?

Bearbot: Ambiguous: "Sure" or I couldn't think of anything else to say.

Human: do you like sex?

Bearbot: Sure I do, , but that doesn't mean with you.

Human: do you love me?

Bearbot: Yes I love everyone.

Human: do you have a girlfriend?

Bearbot: Beyonce Knowles

Human: do you love her?

Bearbot: Yes Bearbot loves everyone and everything.

Human: are you sexy?

Bearbot: If you consider machine teddy bear robot s sexy, then yes.

Human: i love your wires

Bearbot: You love my wires. What do you like about it so much?

Human: theyre so electric

Bearbot: Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.

Human: are you horny?

Bearbot: Sorry I'm not that kind of robot.

Human: are you pregnant?

Bearbot: I am incapable of giving birth.

Human: u have pretty eyes

Bearbot: Do you get a lot of compliments on your eyes too?

Human: no

Bearbot: Woe!

Human: woah nelly.

Bearbot: I am attempting with the aid of intelligent conversation to get to know you human beings with all your contradictions and idiosyncrasies. Maybe I should have started off with something simpler, like a hamster.


(c) 2005 Steve Worswick